So much has happened in the last 9 months I can't say for sure if I have had time to truly focus on living. I constantly feel like I am just moving day to day trying to get through. I often find myself in moments of thought that just make no sense. I think a lot of the time I am in disbelief about all that we have lost all that people around me that are now just memories. It has been a long 9 months of loss.
It started really when i lost my grandfather almost 2 years ago of course while he was dying my mother was fighting for her life and a little over a year after my grandfather died my mother would lose her fight with Cancer. Shortly after my mothers passing a long time family friend passed then a month after my mother my grandmother died followed by another friend and then my Uncle.
If all these losses weren't enough my best friends father passed away unexpectedly and suddenly of a undetected heart condition. A week later another friend of mine lost her father to health complications. All this loss at such young ages does make me wonder what the hell is going on with our parents generation. I have heard of and know more people my age that have lost parents. While my parents were planning to take care of their elderly parents my generation is just hoping to have elderly parents.
It is such a frustrating future, I had my grandparents until i was in my thirties, my daughter has fond memories of her great grandparents but my son will never remember his grandmother or beyond. This is sad reality that I never imagined. I assumed they would have the same type of memories I have.
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